‘FANTASTIQUE’ was the word used by our Prime Minister to describe the State visit of President Macron and his wife to the UK. The pomp and pageantry attached to these spectacles not only project Britain’s heritage and majesty abroad, but are used as vital tools in diplomacy. Some observers describe this veiled power as Britain’s ‘marshmallow fist in a velvet glove’.
President Macron follows in a long line of distinguished overseas leaders to be accorded this wonderful and exclusive invitation. Mr Mugabe, Mr Ceausescu, Mr Putin and Emperor Hirohito all appreciated the opportunity to meet our Royal Family and revel in the grandeur of the occasion.
For UK residents it is a chance to savour the fact that Britain is still an important player on the world stage and that come what may, Britannia still rules the waves. President Macron’s visit was a chance for cheering UK citizens to throng the streets waving tricolour flags welcoming this very special dignitary.
The now familiar open-top carriage ride is still a sight to behold, whilst the banquet held at Buckingham Palace with their Majesties the King and Queen in attendance is everyone’s idea of how Britain still does things ‘the right way’. Yet, this was no hidebound old-fashioned feast attended by crusty diplomats and mandarins. In keeping with the times, celebrities such as Sir Mick Jagger and Sir Elton John were included.
However, behind the ostentatious show, honeyed words, costumes and reciprocal toasts, there is of course a far more important element to State Visits. That part relates to the backroom discussions undertaken by experienced negotiators from both sides. Trade and other vital aspects of mutual consequence are thrashed out behind closed doors.
Sir Keir Starmer and President Macron jointly hosted a press conference to outline areas of co-operation that have proven contentious and hitherto been thought irreconcilable.
The first announcement – and the one for which most people were especially anxious about – related to croissants. There had been a general fear that these delicious breakfast staples were in some way under threat from being classified as Protected Designation of Origin (PDOs) which require the product to possess a given quality, reputation or other characteristic attributable to a particular area and require all the production steps to take place in that area.
Thankfully after discussions running late into the night the British team managed to extract an agreement from their French counterparts that croissants could still be manufactured in the UK and sold as such. There was further good news that this dispensation, or derogation as it is officially called, will apply equally both to all-butter croissants and pain au chocolat – the latter proving a sticking point for many hours.
Sadly, and despite valiant and unstinting efforts on the UK side, the vexed question of baguettes remains unresolved.
After achieving this Viennoiserie breakthrough, the negotiators decided that a pause was needed before they embarked on the thorny question of berets. These soft, round, flat-crowned caps made of hand-knitted wool, crocheted cotton, felt or acrylic fibre are synonymous with France yet enjoy popularity here is the UK.
Many individuals who have completed military service will be familiar with this headdress and associated insignia. The French however feel that this millinery accessory is exclusive to La Republique, and proposed a total ban on sales of berets in the UK. After what participants described as a marathon session, both sides were happy to unveil a communiqué which suited all parties.
‘Berets, in whatever colour or material are French. As such they shall no longer be on sale in the United Kingdom or her dependent territories. Ireland remains a separate entity and will be permitted to sell but not produce berets under the Windsor Framework.’
Commenting on this momentous announcement the Prime Minister said: ‘Make no mistake, when people say change is not possible, I say change your opinion. Change can happen if everyone is willing to make that change happen. Change is what makes our country great.’
Aside from these key announcements there were some minor, yet other significant topics that came under discussion.
President Macron has for many years made representation to the UK Government concerning the huge volume of (as he calls them) regular tourists making their way across the Channel to France.
Some arrive by boats, trafficked for large sums of money by gangs of travel agents, whilst others make the more perilous journey by plane. Furious French residents have grown accustomed to the sight of these unwelcome visitors making a nuisance of themselves. Several wear apparel that is more suited to their homeland – the knotted handkerchief being the most tell-tale garment.
But it is their behaviour that causes most irritation. Locals complain of overcrowding at restaurants across the whole of the country but especially in the Dordogne and southern areas. This, allied to an almost insatiable thirst for wine – red, white and rosé, have earned these interlopers an unenviable reputation.
As a solution Mr Macron has suggested paying the UK authorities to put a stop to these incursions.
The Prime Minister is taking this suggestion seriously and hopes to provide a compromise that will accommodate all parties’ needs.
